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Socalmountains.com :: Forums :: JOKES & FUNNY/STUPID STORIES
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Lexophilia

Author Post
MrOwl
Mon Aug 13 2018, 07:17AM Email Thread Print View

Registered Member #13568
Joined: Sun Oct 23 2016, 01:54PM
:
Posts: 1430
• Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!

• How does Moses make tea? Hebrews it.

• England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.

• I tried to catch some fog, but I mist

• They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Typo.

• I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.

• Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

• I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.

• I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.

• This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.

• When chemists die, they barium.

• I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

• I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.

• I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

• Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?

• When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.

• Broken pencils are pointless.

• What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

• I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.

• I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.

• Velcro - what a rip off!

• Don't worry about old age; it doesn't last.


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Moderators: Craig ⭐, ©ammy ⭐, Lumber Jill ⭐, Mtngoat John⭐, Deb Doodah⭐, SCM ALERT🚨, Benny ⭐, Socalmountains Admin, ⚡WX ALERT⚡

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yz4me
May 26 : 09:15pm
Thank you

⚡WX ALERT⚡
May 26 : 09:15pm
Not a whole lot, yet. There are reports of a couple spun out vehicles through Arctic Circle, but looking at the Snow Valley cam, not much has accumulated on the roads. With the temp still above freezing roads should be ok, just wet for now. As temperatures drop below freezing later tonight, expect some ice/snow develop on the roadways so travel safely if you must!

There's is another decent band of snow moving in over the next hour or two.... [Click Here]

yz4me
May 26 : 09:08pm
Any snow on the roads out there?

SCM ALERT🚨
May 26 : 08:43pm
Reported Structure Fire Big Bear City: Chimney Burnout - Units Report Fire Out Upon Arrival - Cancel The Balance Of The Response More Info: [Click Here]

SCM ALERT🚨
May 26 : 08:38pm
TYPE: STRUCTURE FIRE AREA: BIG BEAR CITY 3XX BARKER BLVD - BBC X N GOLD MOUNTAIN DR/N PARADISE WAY UNITS: ME282 BC2805 MT281 MA282A MA281 CLOCK10B LPTAC9D 2TAC3 BFAALL FEDCOM
More Info: Click Here
Live Scanner: Click Here

Benny ⭐
May 26 : 08:21pm
R2 chain restrictions now if effect from snow valley to the big bear dam. (Arctic Circke)

Benny ⭐
May 26 : 08:19pm
I knew the answer cause I googled it, but didn't want to spoil it for the others!

SCM ALERT🚨
May 26 : 08:15pm
CHAIN RESTRICTIONS EXIST IN PORTIONS OF THE SAN BERNARDINO MOUNTAINS
For realtime conditions, click here: [Click Here]

Polar Orbit
May 26 : 08:12pm
And apologies for the senility reference.

Polar Orbit
May 26 : 08:05pm
Yeahhh... "Carry on" on the Deja Vu album. 1970.

ChillyBeans
May 26 : 08:00pm
OMG I think I know the answer.
CSN&Y?

Polar Orbit
May 26 : 07:21pm
Another test for those of us approaching senility. 10 points for the first correct answer!!!

Polar Orbit
May 26 : 07:15pm
Caarrrry chains... snoooowwww is coming... snooowwwwww is coming to us all!!!

⚡WX ALERT⚡
May 26 : 07:03pm
Another wave of moisture will move through the area over the next several hours with more rain and snow showers likely. The snow level could dip to around 6,000 feet with a couple inches possible. Travel safely and carry chains just in case!

Benny ⭐
May 26 : 04:59pm
No, you're right Fawn, hopefully next year if they have more eaglets they'll do the same thing but let them public vote on them. They can vote on them with a $1 donation each or something..... Would be a great fundraiser for Friends of the Big Bear Valley!



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